The Virgin Prince's War Journal
The grim and gritty side of things. If everyone had a soundtrack to their lives, mine would be the best.
Thursday, May 20, 2004
Canada Ho!
To all of you long and lean as a Tennessee stud,
Last night, sometime after giving myself a Mr. Glass haircut and before doing a batch of laundry, I started packing. Why you ask? Why I’m going to Canada, yet again! I’m gathering up my finest threads, films, and music, as well as my under-used Twister mat, and going to land of the free-flying maple leaf, where I intend to gorge myself nightly on Molson XXX and deep-fried beavertail.
In unfortunate other news, Tony Randall is dead. Damn you, Tony Randall! First, Roddy McDowall, then Jonathan Harris, and now Tony Randall. If this keeps up, we’ll have no notibly poofy actors left with which to entertain the younger generation. We’ll be left reliant solely on David Hyde-Pierce and Bert and Ernie. Feckle.
Unfortunately, I can’t write much, the time of my flight is quickly approaching. Now, now, dry your eyes, I’ll soon be back with more tales to tell, and grand stories of my experiences in the fabled land of Canada. Amusing anecdotes for all! Certainly, the two bottles of discontinued vodka I’m bringing with me nearly guarantee action, adventure, and hilarity to ensue!
Before I go, I just want to make my Yankee brethren aware of something. The assault weapon ban which keeps uzis, ak-47s, and other such ridiculous weapons illegal is about to expire. It runs out in September if I recall correctly. This ban could easily be renewed, keep such dangerous weapons off of the streets, but Bush has deliberately done nothing to do so. Why, you ask? Well, aside from the fact that Bush is a murdering bastard that rather delights in death, the truth is, Bush wants the support of the NRA for the upcoming election. Kerry has a more even chance at winning than he’d like, so Bush is going to let assault weapons become available to the public so that the NRA won’t join the many groups against him when voting time comes around.
Pandering to fanatics and allowing deadly weapons onto our streets, that’s our president for you.
To you, the people of America, I ask one question. When you consider the possibility of assault weapons on the streets, and the fact that the whole world hates us, the fact that our soldiers keep getting shipped to Iraq to die, and the draft that will start up after the election, or even the knowledge of how terribly the Bush administration bungled things up on September 11th, do you really feel that Bush has made the country more safe? What about the possibility of being shipped off to Guantanamo Bay without the government having any responsibility to say why you were sent, what you’re doing there, acknowledging you’re actually there, or when you’re coming back? When you consider all these things, do you think your life expectancy has actually gone UP during the past four years?
Don’t believe the lie. Please do your part to get Bush out of office.
Be seeing you,
The Virgin Prince
P.S. Vote Kerry!
Last night, sometime after giving myself a Mr. Glass haircut and before doing a batch of laundry, I started packing. Why you ask? Why I’m going to Canada, yet again! I’m gathering up my finest threads, films, and music, as well as my under-used Twister mat, and going to land of the free-flying maple leaf, where I intend to gorge myself nightly on Molson XXX and deep-fried beavertail.
In unfortunate other news, Tony Randall is dead. Damn you, Tony Randall! First, Roddy McDowall, then Jonathan Harris, and now Tony Randall. If this keeps up, we’ll have no notibly poofy actors left with which to entertain the younger generation. We’ll be left reliant solely on David Hyde-Pierce and Bert and Ernie. Feckle.
Unfortunately, I can’t write much, the time of my flight is quickly approaching. Now, now, dry your eyes, I’ll soon be back with more tales to tell, and grand stories of my experiences in the fabled land of Canada. Amusing anecdotes for all! Certainly, the two bottles of discontinued vodka I’m bringing with me nearly guarantee action, adventure, and hilarity to ensue!
Before I go, I just want to make my Yankee brethren aware of something. The assault weapon ban which keeps uzis, ak-47s, and other such ridiculous weapons illegal is about to expire. It runs out in September if I recall correctly. This ban could easily be renewed, keep such dangerous weapons off of the streets, but Bush has deliberately done nothing to do so. Why, you ask? Well, aside from the fact that Bush is a murdering bastard that rather delights in death, the truth is, Bush wants the support of the NRA for the upcoming election. Kerry has a more even chance at winning than he’d like, so Bush is going to let assault weapons become available to the public so that the NRA won’t join the many groups against him when voting time comes around.
Pandering to fanatics and allowing deadly weapons onto our streets, that’s our president for you.
To you, the people of America, I ask one question. When you consider the possibility of assault weapons on the streets, and the fact that the whole world hates us, the fact that our soldiers keep getting shipped to Iraq to die, and the draft that will start up after the election, or even the knowledge of how terribly the Bush administration bungled things up on September 11th, do you really feel that Bush has made the country more safe? What about the possibility of being shipped off to Guantanamo Bay without the government having any responsibility to say why you were sent, what you’re doing there, acknowledging you’re actually there, or when you’re coming back? When you consider all these things, do you think your life expectancy has actually gone UP during the past four years?
Don’t believe the lie. Please do your part to get Bush out of office.
The Virgin Prince
P.S. Vote Kerry!
